Jesus Christ, today was absolute hell at work!
So it's been a while since I bitched about my job so I guess I'll update that area of my life.
Today I had to apprehend four people at work for three separate incidents of theft. I can't fucking believe it - THREE times!
Now, for those of you who don't know (which is you know, everyone), that's very unusual. I stop theft as much as I can but I usually catch people about once a week if things are going well. Sometimes I go a couple of weeks without catching anyone and that bothers me. I get sort of in my work depression mode if I don't keep catching people. Twice in one day is unheard of. Three in one day is just abso-fucking-lutely in-fucking-sane! I've never had three in one day.
First there was a dipshit that I spotted from the moment he hit the door and thought "OK this guy's suspicious..." He just smelled like a rat. Damn thieves. Fuck thieves. This mother fucker tries to stuff four playstation 3 games in his pants. He succeeded in this much but I stopped him at the door in front of a huge crowd and demanded that he hand over the merchandise. It really helped that I was surrounded by people on a busy Saturday. I was screaming at him "Hand it over NOW NOW NOW! ALL OF IT!" ahhh...he dropped his pants, handed over the games, said "I"M SORRY" and then left humiliated. He ran out the door holding his pants and got in his car. He nearly hit another vehicle peeling out of our parking lot. Hilarious. It was grand, just too thrilling. He was absolutely embarrassed beyond words. I loved it. I got a round of applause and several high fives from the stampede of employees that rushed my way as I announced the theft. I was ze hero and it was awesome.
The second theft of the day was far more subtle but it was more dangerous. I say that because the guy I caught was off in the head. I noticed him on camera and started stalking him simply based on the fact that I didn't like his appearance. Yeah, I'm an ass like that. Sue me. But no seriously - he looked like a psychotic crack head. I'm pretty sure that's precisely what he actually was though. White male, 40's-ish, tall and lanky, sunken cheek bones and a glare that just screams, "I'm crazy!". His overly large coat and baggy clothing didn't help calm my suspicions. Sure enough, he stashed two rap CDs in his coat but I had him on camera. He immediately turned to me and saw me watching him. Then, magically, like the obvious, inescapable sun rising over the east, it DAWNED on this dumb ass, "Oh shit, she just caught me concealing this merchandise"....yeah, no shit. He went to the next isle and dropped them before bolting out of the store. I grinned and thanked him.
Case number three was far more complex and hard to crack. I again pinned them at the front door - I knew they were up to no good. I could just tell they were cheap bastards who didn't intend to pay for shit. They attempted to steal software, movies, cds and even fucking candy dude. Seriously, they were assholes. It took the entire store's help in recovering the merchandise after they kept getting busted. I asked my manager to kick them out but he refused - that spineless pussy. I'd ask them to leave in a heartbeat, you can bet on that. I'd love to kick them out and tell them to never come back. In the end, they paid for a game and a pack of blank CDs but only because they knew they couldn't steal anything. I obnoxiously applauded them as they left and yelled, "Thank you for actually PAYING for that you guys. We appreciate you PAYING for it!" They didn't say shit because they knew I had them on camera. They were humiliated and it was too funny.
I have no sympathy for those who try to steal. To actually have the nerve to say "I'm sorry!" when you're caught is absolutely pathetic. No, you're not sorry you did it. You're sorry you got caught. There is a difference. If they'd gotten away with it, they'd not be sorry at all.
I'll come right out and say it also, and you can hate me all you want for this: black people steal more than white people in my region. Call me racist or whatever, I'm just naming a proven statistic. I don't watch them more than whites, hispanics or asians. I watch them all equally but it's a proven fact: black people (particularly young males) steal way more than any other group of people. It's really sickening because there is already a stereotype floating about regarding young, black males. Why are they making it worse for themselves? One guy even had the nerve to scream, "Oh it's because I'm black, isn't it?!?" No, you asshole, you actually stole something. That fucking sickens me. To use race as an excuse for me to be unable to approach you about your own wrong doings is fucking despicable! How disgusting can you possible be? How sickening! Life forms like that shouldn't even be allowed freedoms if they're going to abuse them like that.
We should just ship all assholes like that to a deserted island. If I happen to accidentally launch a missile its way and blow them all up....well, woops.
My bad.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Theft
I can't really fully express how much I hate theft.
Today we got hit and I mean hit HARD by some mother fucker with no morals.
I went in today at 3 PM, but I usually arrive early - 30 minutes early to be exact - and I was immediately pulled aside and informed that we had just experienced a HUGE loss. I won't say what the item was, but believe me...it was fucking expensive. They don't know who did it or at what time. The person also happened to do it in a blind spot where my security cameras cannot get to and THAT is even more frustrating. We think it might be an inside job, but we can't tell.
After I clocked on, I was extra vigilant in watching the area that was being targeted. I kept updating the employees on the situation via the walkie-talkies that we all carry and I maintained a constant eye on possible thieves. I can usually spot it when people are acting suspicious but today was just so strange - every fucking person seemed suspicious! I didn't know which was heads or tails today.
I went on lunch around 7 at night only to get back and be greeted by another loss of the very same item that we'd lost earlier that day.
Now what a fucking coincidence that they stole it when I was on lunch. What a fucking coincidence that they stole it before I clocked on earlier today as well. hmm makes me wonder.
We've had a recent spike and we didn't get this bad until we hired some losers for holiday seasonal help to assist us with our Christmas rush of customers.
I was forced to endure a meeting this morning and listen to my boss bitch at us for doing this or that wrong or for talking to the other employees too much. We were then accused of not being passionate enough about stopping theft simply because we don't talk about it "every day like we should be doing" in our store's morning meetings. Well, she is dead wrong.
NO ONE could be more passionate about stopping theft than me. She couldn't ask for a more honest, loyal employee. I simply don't talk about theft very much in our meetings because I am a shy person and I hate speaking in front of people in the form of groups. This is not to say, however, that I would not take care of a thief and secure merchandise. I most certainly wouldn't let my shyness get in the way of my job or cause it to make me less passionate about catching theft. It angers me for her to even SUGGEST for a fraction of a moment that I am not passionate enough. She said, "How can we claim we are passionate about it when we don't even discuss it in the meetings?"
I was further frustrated because I came up with possible solutions to her complaints and she just brushed them aside. If anyone lacks passion about preventing theft, it's her not me. She just bitched at us because she thinks she's not doing her job unless we get bitched at. She said, "If I see you guys having a conversation with someone from now on, it's an automatic write up."
Dude, I fucking dare this bitch to write me up. The world would fucking end and hell would freeze over. I'll be damned if I allow someone to write ME up. Other people get write ups. Amanda Carter does not. I am not your ordinary fucking average Jane employee. I've been written up ONCE and it was over 3 years ago. I forgot to attend a meeting and my GM was angry over my absence so he wrote me up. That was in summer 2006. If they ever write me up, they'd better have a good God damned reason for it because I'm among the best they have. PERIOD.
I know I'm a good, hard worker so FUCK THEM.
And FUCK the thieves. I think those fuckers know better than to come in on my shift, or if it's an employee I think they know better than to try to get that shit past me. Whatever it is, I'm going to raise hell if I find out who it is. I can't guarantee I won't do something that might cost me my job because I just might grow that angry on the spot if I bust the person. I have caught internal theft before and I was absolutely livid!
I gave a lecture in the meeting tonight after the store was closed. We had a large crew tonight and everyone got to hear me rant. My manager turned the floor over to me to actually talk to everyone and my anger was far more powerful than any amount of shyness I might have otherwise had within me. I simply let into everyone and expressed how there was no excuse for us to have let it happen. I said we were all to blame and that things must change around the store. We lack the passion and drive to actually GIVE A SHIT and contact customers to the point of deterring theft. I told them they should all be as angry as I am because it hurts our NOP (net operating profit) which affects our quarterly bonus and our labor budget. I'm sure employees would get on the ball if it started biting into their fucking paycheck, and it WILL happen if this theft problem gets worse.
I just find it so troubling because I can't stop it if I'm not there for it. It makes me want to be there at all times to catch this motherfucker but I do have a life and other things to tend to. Besides, it'd drive me nuts to work all the time and they wouldn't let me anyhow - I'd have overtime out the ass. I just can't solve this because I'm 99.9999% sure they're not stealing on my shift.
I hate thieves.
If I had my way, we'd do like they did in the old days and cut off thieves' hands.
Now I'm NOT saying I'd do it to someone who was stealing food because they were hungry. I can understand that a little more because it plays into human survival (its still wrong but more understandable at least) but stealing electronics?! NO. Just NO. As I said, I'd love to cut the hands off people who fucking steal.
It pisses me off when they get caught and they say, "I'm sorry!"
Bullshit dude, you're not sorry you did it. You're sorry you got caught.
There's a big fucking difference.
If you got away with it, you'd not be "sorry"!
Being sorry means you have true remorse for what you have done.
You're not sorry you did it, just sorry you didn't do it successfully.
People shouldn't have such tolerance. It makes me fucking angry. Don't give me that bullshit about, "Oh we're all human. People make mistakes. People can change. Society should forgive past wrongs and crimes of people and give them a second change."
Bull-fucking-shit
Yes, we all are human.
Yes, we all make mistakes.
Yes, we all do shit we aren't proud of.
But we shouldn't tolerate these behaviors and shrug them off as if we're passing off our humanity as an excusable reason for us to just fuck things up and its OK. No, no it's not ok. If societies tolerate such bullshit from people, people will keep fucking doing it. Thieves that come into my store are people and steal are those who try it repeatedly. If someone comes in who has been caught stealing before, you can bet they're in there trying it again.
So don't say how cutting off hands is cruel unusual punishment. They should have thought of it when they were stealing. If I had my way, those fuckers wouldn't be in jail with 3 meals a day supported by my tax dollars. They'd just get the punishment of not having a hand and be reminded of their fuck up every second of every God damned day when they wish they had a second hand and curse their own stupidity. Who needs tax dollars to support assholes like that when you had good, old fashioned justice to be both the solution and the future deterrence for such actions? I'll cut off the fuckers hand for free as a matter of fact so we can spend tax dollars on more important stuff like our educational system.
Everyone wins.
Fuck thieves.
Oh and...
fuck my boss as well.
She's a bitch.
out.
Today we got hit and I mean hit HARD by some mother fucker with no morals.
I went in today at 3 PM, but I usually arrive early - 30 minutes early to be exact - and I was immediately pulled aside and informed that we had just experienced a HUGE loss. I won't say what the item was, but believe me...it was fucking expensive. They don't know who did it or at what time. The person also happened to do it in a blind spot where my security cameras cannot get to and THAT is even more frustrating. We think it might be an inside job, but we can't tell.
After I clocked on, I was extra vigilant in watching the area that was being targeted. I kept updating the employees on the situation via the walkie-talkies that we all carry and I maintained a constant eye on possible thieves. I can usually spot it when people are acting suspicious but today was just so strange - every fucking person seemed suspicious! I didn't know which was heads or tails today.
I went on lunch around 7 at night only to get back and be greeted by another loss of the very same item that we'd lost earlier that day.
Now what a fucking coincidence that they stole it when I was on lunch. What a fucking coincidence that they stole it before I clocked on earlier today as well. hmm makes me wonder.
We've had a recent spike and we didn't get this bad until we hired some losers for holiday seasonal help to assist us with our Christmas rush of customers.
I was forced to endure a meeting this morning and listen to my boss bitch at us for doing this or that wrong or for talking to the other employees too much. We were then accused of not being passionate enough about stopping theft simply because we don't talk about it "every day like we should be doing" in our store's morning meetings. Well, she is dead wrong.
NO ONE could be more passionate about stopping theft than me. She couldn't ask for a more honest, loyal employee. I simply don't talk about theft very much in our meetings because I am a shy person and I hate speaking in front of people in the form of groups. This is not to say, however, that I would not take care of a thief and secure merchandise. I most certainly wouldn't let my shyness get in the way of my job or cause it to make me less passionate about catching theft. It angers me for her to even SUGGEST for a fraction of a moment that I am not passionate enough. She said, "How can we claim we are passionate about it when we don't even discuss it in the meetings?"
I was further frustrated because I came up with possible solutions to her complaints and she just brushed them aside. If anyone lacks passion about preventing theft, it's her not me. She just bitched at us because she thinks she's not doing her job unless we get bitched at. She said, "If I see you guys having a conversation with someone from now on, it's an automatic write up."
Dude, I fucking dare this bitch to write me up. The world would fucking end and hell would freeze over. I'll be damned if I allow someone to write ME up. Other people get write ups. Amanda Carter does not. I am not your ordinary fucking average Jane employee. I've been written up ONCE and it was over 3 years ago. I forgot to attend a meeting and my GM was angry over my absence so he wrote me up. That was in summer 2006. If they ever write me up, they'd better have a good God damned reason for it because I'm among the best they have. PERIOD.
I know I'm a good, hard worker so FUCK THEM.
And FUCK the thieves. I think those fuckers know better than to come in on my shift, or if it's an employee I think they know better than to try to get that shit past me. Whatever it is, I'm going to raise hell if I find out who it is. I can't guarantee I won't do something that might cost me my job because I just might grow that angry on the spot if I bust the person. I have caught internal theft before and I was absolutely livid!
I gave a lecture in the meeting tonight after the store was closed. We had a large crew tonight and everyone got to hear me rant. My manager turned the floor over to me to actually talk to everyone and my anger was far more powerful than any amount of shyness I might have otherwise had within me. I simply let into everyone and expressed how there was no excuse for us to have let it happen. I said we were all to blame and that things must change around the store. We lack the passion and drive to actually GIVE A SHIT and contact customers to the point of deterring theft. I told them they should all be as angry as I am because it hurts our NOP (net operating profit) which affects our quarterly bonus and our labor budget. I'm sure employees would get on the ball if it started biting into their fucking paycheck, and it WILL happen if this theft problem gets worse.
I just find it so troubling because I can't stop it if I'm not there for it. It makes me want to be there at all times to catch this motherfucker but I do have a life and other things to tend to. Besides, it'd drive me nuts to work all the time and they wouldn't let me anyhow - I'd have overtime out the ass. I just can't solve this because I'm 99.9999% sure they're not stealing on my shift.
I hate thieves.
If I had my way, we'd do like they did in the old days and cut off thieves' hands.
Now I'm NOT saying I'd do it to someone who was stealing food because they were hungry. I can understand that a little more because it plays into human survival (its still wrong but more understandable at least) but stealing electronics?! NO. Just NO. As I said, I'd love to cut the hands off people who fucking steal.
It pisses me off when they get caught and they say, "I'm sorry!"
Bullshit dude, you're not sorry you did it. You're sorry you got caught.
There's a big fucking difference.
If you got away with it, you'd not be "sorry"!
Being sorry means you have true remorse for what you have done.
You're not sorry you did it, just sorry you didn't do it successfully.
People shouldn't have such tolerance. It makes me fucking angry. Don't give me that bullshit about, "Oh we're all human. People make mistakes. People can change. Society should forgive past wrongs and crimes of people and give them a second change."
Bull-fucking-shit
Yes, we all are human.
Yes, we all make mistakes.
Yes, we all do shit we aren't proud of.
But we shouldn't tolerate these behaviors and shrug them off as if we're passing off our humanity as an excusable reason for us to just fuck things up and its OK. No, no it's not ok. If societies tolerate such bullshit from people, people will keep fucking doing it. Thieves that come into my store are people and steal are those who try it repeatedly. If someone comes in who has been caught stealing before, you can bet they're in there trying it again.
So don't say how cutting off hands is cruel unusual punishment. They should have thought of it when they were stealing. If I had my way, those fuckers wouldn't be in jail with 3 meals a day supported by my tax dollars. They'd just get the punishment of not having a hand and be reminded of their fuck up every second of every God damned day when they wish they had a second hand and curse their own stupidity. Who needs tax dollars to support assholes like that when you had good, old fashioned justice to be both the solution and the future deterrence for such actions? I'll cut off the fuckers hand for free as a matter of fact so we can spend tax dollars on more important stuff like our educational system.
Everyone wins.
Fuck thieves.
Oh and...
fuck my boss as well.
She's a bitch.
out.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Stupid fucking people
Stupid ass fucking retarded dumb fucks need to die.
Yes, I'm angry.
For a change, I'm NOT angry with a fucking customer.
I'm angry that the piece of shit, fat assed, lazy mother fucker that is my part time help tried his power trip shit on me.
We are asset protection, formerly "loss prevention". I've spoken about my duties before, but allow me to give another brief description. We simply watch monitors and make sure shit doesn't get stolen. We monitor the building and its surroundings. We perform security and maintenance around the building, regarding things like light fixtures, stocking of products, all doors and exits, fire safety hazards and the like. We stamp employee purchases to ensure that they are paid for and to show that we have properly verified that a transaction took place. Our little jobs are boring and simple, but they are a part of what keeps merchandise in and thieves out.
I have this ass-hole co-worker named Chris. He is the fat guy at the door in my video from my Job Vlog He hasn't been there very long, only a few months. 4 months max. I trained the mother fucker! I am the full timer, and he is my part timer. I'm considered his "senior" in the store, and I've worked for Best Buy for over 3 fucking years now!
I have had so many employees tell me stories of his power trip issues, I fucking can't stand the guy now. I edited out the portion of my "Job Vlog" where he threatened to take my camera away. Well, it's a public place and I can legally film in there so FUCK HIM. He said several times that he was going to take away my camera, and was like "I'm serious" and I was like "stop talking shit man"...then he acted like he was joking, seeing how I wasn't going to take his shit. He then got a little cooler at that point and was like "ok..." But I knew that he really was trying to try that power trip shit on me. I knew he was actually serious. FUCK HIM dude, I fucking can't stand the guy.
So then me and Ray went into the store today since I was off, and we were looking at buying some DVDs. Ray picked up a horrible movie called "Zombie Strippers" and laughed at it as he showed me the case. I was like "hell fucking no!" and I knocked it out of his hand, but yeah we were only playing.... we were laughing and joking for Christ's sake! Everyone around the store knows us, and they all know that we do nothing but laugh and joke when we come in! Chris looks at us with a serious face, and is like "I'm going to have to ask you not to throw the merchandise around".... WTF! I look at this guy like "Are you serious?" and then told him I'd throw it at HIM! I then simulate me stomping on the DVD as it lies on the ground to further piss him off. He then adds "No matter how much the movie sucks, I'm going to ask you once more not to throw the merchandise" .... I'm the fucking senior asset protection rep in the store, I KNOW not to harm merchandise! Not only that, but I didn't "throw" it God damn it. I merely knocked it out of Ray's hand in jest as we were BOTH laughing, and there was no hostility involved. Even the fucking managers would've laughed at the situation, hell they clown and horse around with us! But this fucker? no... no he thinks his little security guard-ish job is so fucking high class, and it makes him feel so God damned self important to throw around his title as if he's just the shit.
I then pick the DVD up and Ray takes it, and I look directly at Chris and knock it out of Ray's hand just to spite the guy. Seriously dude, we're just store security, get over your fucking self. He's like the guy from "Observe and Report" (the movie) who took his mall security guard job a little too fucking seriously. I am serious about theft, but not employees clowning around while they're shopping around the store. I got better shit to do with my time.
Stupid fuck.
Yes, I'm angry.
For a change, I'm NOT angry with a fucking customer.
I'm angry that the piece of shit, fat assed, lazy mother fucker that is my part time help tried his power trip shit on me.
We are asset protection, formerly "loss prevention". I've spoken about my duties before, but allow me to give another brief description. We simply watch monitors and make sure shit doesn't get stolen. We monitor the building and its surroundings. We perform security and maintenance around the building, regarding things like light fixtures, stocking of products, all doors and exits, fire safety hazards and the like. We stamp employee purchases to ensure that they are paid for and to show that we have properly verified that a transaction took place. Our little jobs are boring and simple, but they are a part of what keeps merchandise in and thieves out.
I have this ass-hole co-worker named Chris. He is the fat guy at the door in my video from my Job Vlog He hasn't been there very long, only a few months. 4 months max. I trained the mother fucker! I am the full timer, and he is my part timer. I'm considered his "senior" in the store, and I've worked for Best Buy for over 3 fucking years now!
I have had so many employees tell me stories of his power trip issues, I fucking can't stand the guy now. I edited out the portion of my "Job Vlog" where he threatened to take my camera away. Well, it's a public place and I can legally film in there so FUCK HIM. He said several times that he was going to take away my camera, and was like "I'm serious" and I was like "stop talking shit man"...then he acted like he was joking, seeing how I wasn't going to take his shit. He then got a little cooler at that point and was like "ok..." But I knew that he really was trying to try that power trip shit on me. I knew he was actually serious. FUCK HIM dude, I fucking can't stand the guy.
So then me and Ray went into the store today since I was off, and we were looking at buying some DVDs. Ray picked up a horrible movie called "Zombie Strippers" and laughed at it as he showed me the case. I was like "hell fucking no!" and I knocked it out of his hand, but yeah we were only playing.... we were laughing and joking for Christ's sake! Everyone around the store knows us, and they all know that we do nothing but laugh and joke when we come in! Chris looks at us with a serious face, and is like "I'm going to have to ask you not to throw the merchandise around".... WTF! I look at this guy like "Are you serious?" and then told him I'd throw it at HIM! I then simulate me stomping on the DVD as it lies on the ground to further piss him off. He then adds "No matter how much the movie sucks, I'm going to ask you once more not to throw the merchandise" .... I'm the fucking senior asset protection rep in the store, I KNOW not to harm merchandise! Not only that, but I didn't "throw" it God damn it. I merely knocked it out of Ray's hand in jest as we were BOTH laughing, and there was no hostility involved. Even the fucking managers would've laughed at the situation, hell they clown and horse around with us! But this fucker? no... no he thinks his little security guard-ish job is so fucking high class, and it makes him feel so God damned self important to throw around his title as if he's just the shit.
I then pick the DVD up and Ray takes it, and I look directly at Chris and knock it out of Ray's hand just to spite the guy. Seriously dude, we're just store security, get over your fucking self. He's like the guy from "Observe and Report" (the movie) who took his mall security guard job a little too fucking seriously. I am serious about theft, but not employees clowning around while they're shopping around the store. I got better shit to do with my time.
Stupid fuck.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Job Vlog!
On Sunday, July 26th, 2009, I made a job video blog, a.k.a. "vlog"
It was originally over 20 minutes, but of course I shortened it because well...frankly, no one would watch 20 minutes of random shit at my job (10 is pushing it) and also, YouTube won't accept it if it's over 10 minutes lol.
So here is my vlog in all its glory (not really...)
If the video is choppy or skippy seemingly, it is simply because I edited it that way, taking out over half the footage. I just wanted to give a tour of my place of employment. I find it interesting, and not interesting at all.
Fun!
It was originally over 20 minutes, but of course I shortened it because well...frankly, no one would watch 20 minutes of random shit at my job (10 is pushing it) and also, YouTube won't accept it if it's over 10 minutes lol.
So here is my vlog in all its glory (not really...)
If the video is choppy or skippy seemingly, it is simply because I edited it that way, taking out over half the footage. I just wanted to give a tour of my place of employment. I find it interesting, and not interesting at all.
Fun!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
You're all just insane
Tonight's blog will consist of random stories!
Here lately we've had an onslaught of rude people at my store. Perhaps there was a national "Let's All Be An Asshole" holiday in which the general public (remember the synonym for "general public" is IDIOTS mind you!) of America partook?
I must have missed the memo.
...in fair Verona...woops, I mean Best Buy... where we lay our scene...
So yesterday I was up at my post at the front door, as always (where else would I be?) and I see a woman charging toward my desk in a huff. I ready myself, as I've been here countless times no doubt, and it's a daily occurrence by now considering I am the last point of contact, and I am the only person in the store who NEVER MOVES. This enables LUCKY ME to be the one person in the ENTIRE store who the happy-go-lucky customer can ALWAYS find!
So, when the customer wants help, of course they usually come to me.
*huff puff*
This woman came up to my desk, as I said.
"Would you say that you guys were 'busy' right now?"
*Woman, don't try to trap me with a question like that, I know better...bitch.*
Now, lets take a step back and analyze this for a bit. She really was trying to get even more of a rise out of the situation, trying to add fuel to the fire by attempting to pose a bit of a "trick" question to me. What I mean by that is simply this: there is not a good answer to that question, considering it's a "yes" or "no" answer she is seeking.
If I answer "yes", it implies that I am admitting we are swamped, too busy for her and that she therefore is not a priority to me/us.
If I say "no" then it implies that there is no excuse for her not getting help, since we have all the fucking time in the world!
My answer?
"Well, yes Ma'am, we do seem to have a fair amount of business going on at the moment, but perhaps I can be of assistance. What can I do for you?"
*direct dodge*
"Well, (huff) I have been waiting and WAITING in the computer department for someone to help me! I've already called for help ONCE, and I'm NOT waiting much longer!"
Now, I can understand a bit. She asked for help and didn't get it (yet) so she's angry. However, we had alot of customers in the building and she isn't the only one which the earth revolves around, though she may think it. Our associates were genuinely doing all they could to get everyone some help, and I could clearly see that based on my security cameras. I get poised to speak on my walkie talkie that I have strapped to my hip, along with my ear piece attached, and I am about to ask for further assistance as she can CLEARLY see me doing....
"You guy's must not even want my money then!"
*woman, you've made your point, and you can clearly see I am trying to help you. Is taunting me and/or the store going to make more sales personnel magically *POOF* appear in front of you? No. You're acting childish and showing out because you're irritated. You look 40 and you're acting 4*
I was tempted to tell her, "No, we don't want your money actually, we've got plenty already. Have a nice day bitch."
She then proceeds to stop an employee purchasing a snack for him self at our registers (He was on his WELL EARNED lunch break for Christ's sake) before I can even ask for assistance to computers over my walkie talkie. Legally, he is not supposed to "help" her. Labor laws in Louisiana clearly state that he shouldn't assist her in any way while he is not getting paid for it. He could've told her to fuck off. But no...he begrudgingly helped her.
She proceeded to ask him questions, drug him back to the PC desktop displays and then left without purchasing anything.
*this woman complains like she really has some money to spend and as if we are doing her SUCH an injustice by denying her God given right to a computer, then leaves without buying shit*
Bitches....
*shakes head*
__________________________________________________________________________________
This was a bit of a strange thing for a customer to say to me, I thought.
A woman, her husband and some kids walk past my desk as they are exiting.
"Have a nice day"
"Hi Amanda!"
"...Hi!"
*I don't remember this woman, but ah, no biggie. Alot of customers remember me because I sold them something, but I often do not remember them. Just play it cool*
"So how are you liking it up here now? Is it better than the sales floor?"
(She is obviously referring to me changing positions from selling computers/cameras/etc to being asset protection at the front door)
"Oh it's a nice change of pace I guess. I enjoy it, yes"
"You know, you've got to come over and show me how to use my camera!"
* come again? Did she tell me I "Have got to come over"? To where? Her house? I don't even know this woman!*
I quickly thought of something because I didn't remember her, and she's saying I should come to her place and shit...
"Oh! Um...what kind of camera do you have once more? I'm sorry, I forgot!"
"It's the uuhhh...Nikon D60"
"Oh did you know you can go to Youtube and look up videos on it? Yeah ...."
I then proceed to change the subject toward how awesome Youtube has been in aiding me in my quest to learn Sony Vegas (software) functions.
"Oh thanks, I never thought of that!"
"Have a nice day!"
(weirdo...)
________________________________________________________________________________
Why, oh why God....
Why do these ghetto, hoodlum thug boys come in with sagging pants.
I can understand "baggy" pants a little. I myself enjoy baggy clothing, clothing that is loose fitting and not tight all over you. However, my clothing still fits me!
I wonder why women are - even for a millisecond - attracted to men who have their pants sagging. It's fucking... *eye twitch*... I hate the sight of it.
You fucking moron! Pull up your God damn pants.
The pants are by now around their knees almost, and their boxers are showing. They wear belts, not around their waist, but around their thighs.
The cuffs at the bottom of the pants are now pooled around the ankles, collecting in countless folds that look very similar to little accordions above their sneakers.
They look retarded.
It's a fad, I guess.
Am I the only person my age who feels like an old grandma by wanting to say, "Boy pull up your pants and get some clothes that fit you!" or "Take that hair pick out of your hair, what the hell is wrong with you?" or "No one wants to see your underwear you sloppy fucking pig."
Now, granted, I do not have the best attire in the world. I don't wear the best clothing available on the market, God knows. However, I wear clothing that FITS! That's the beautiful, brilliant and honest difference!
I am not making fun of something that are unable to help about themselves, as that would make me a total, utter and complete bitch.
No, I'm pointing out obviously retarded fashions that a person WILLINGLY takes part in! They WILLINGLY dress themselves up in this, and think it's cool.
I'd not date a person like that if they were the last person on earth.
____________________________________________________________________________________
A guy wanted help with a camcorder yesterday.
He asks a person on the sales floor for help, apparently wanting a certain audio/video cable with which to hook it to his television.
The associate excuses herself to go grab the cable for him.
Without waiting for the sales woman to come back to him, he leaves, saying his sales person "abandoned" him!
Bizarre, no?
He then proceeds to come up to the cashiers at the front of the store, near my desk. He leans over the counter and asks the cashier for help:
Signaling to the camcorder he has in his hand, he asks her, "Do you know anything about these?"
The cashier is...A CASHIER! She rings people up! She scans items, totals the transaction and takes their payment. She doesn't know about the electronics really, it's not her forte obviously. She answers him honestly, as she should:
"Well, no sir, not really..."
He gets angry with her, even though HE was the one who asked her the simple yes-or-no question!
"Well never mind! I wont waste my time telling you my story since you don't seem to care!"
....
This guy was just fucking nuts.
_________________________________________________________________________________
Oh! And Saturday I got cursed the fuck out by a customer! AWESOME!
I am required to log all TVs 32" and up, along with all computers which go out my door.
I record the model of the item, the date, transaction number and which register it was rung up on. It helps with many issues, too complicated to name all the reasons I do it. Let's just say it's needed information.
Two overly loud guys walk up to the register to my left, holding a 32" TV. They are joking amongst themselves, showing out. After the transaction, the cashier says to them, "Please let the lady at the door see your receipt as you walk out sir."
He turns to me and yells at me from 10 yards away or so, "Hey! You there! See my receipt!" as he obnoxiously waves it back and forth like a flag.
I smile.
*I want kick this guy in the groin*
The cashier gets his receipt back, and walks over to me, handing me the receipt for him.
I do my recording in my log book as he pick up his TV to carry it out.
"Have a nice day sir"
He now has the TV in his hands (but remember, it's only a 32 inch. It's not like he had 6 new born babies in his fucking arms! He can sit the TV down and take his receipt from me like a decent person. It's a feather weight TV ok!)
"Hey put that receipt in my pocket"
*wait, what?*
I laugh, thinking he's joking. I mean...what guy would request that a woman (a stranger no less) do something which involves such an invasion of privacy and personal space? Surely he's joking...
"No, seriously put the receipt in my pocket"
"Errr..no"
"PUT THE RECEIPT IN MY POCKET!"
My whole demeanor changes at this point.
My smile drops.
My face grows stern.
I look him straight in the face and I practically yell at him.
"I am NOT doing that!"
"Jesus fucking Christ, are you fucking kidding me?!!"
*yes sir, I am kidding you actually. I get that request all the time actually. Men regularly ask me to shove items in their pants, of course. You dumb ass*
I extend my arm forward even more, shoving the receipt in his face and AGAIN tell him to have a nice day.
He starts to rant and rave once more, putting his receipt away after he sets the TV down. He takes extra long so he can stand there beside me, talking shit as I am drowning him out.
*I want to slap him now as well*
I then interrupt and tell him, "Dude, I'm not touching you!"
"Well no one said you could have my receipt either!" he says as he now picks up his TV, and walks backward out my sliding glass doors, facing me so he can still talk shit to me.
I then smile and wave to him casually, as if shooing him out as he leaves
"Have a nice day PAL!"
The "pal" part is a little disrespectful for me to call him, yet not insulting enough for him to demand to speak with my manager.
What a dumb ass.
Here lately we've had an onslaught of rude people at my store. Perhaps there was a national "Let's All Be An Asshole" holiday in which the general public (remember the synonym for "general public" is IDIOTS mind you!) of America partook?
I must have missed the memo.
...in fair Verona...woops, I mean Best Buy... where we lay our scene...
So yesterday I was up at my post at the front door, as always (where else would I be?) and I see a woman charging toward my desk in a huff. I ready myself, as I've been here countless times no doubt, and it's a daily occurrence by now considering I am the last point of contact, and I am the only person in the store who NEVER MOVES. This enables LUCKY ME to be the one person in the ENTIRE store who the happy-go-lucky customer can ALWAYS find!
So, when the customer wants help, of course they usually come to me.
*huff puff*
This woman came up to my desk, as I said.
"Would you say that you guys were 'busy' right now?"
*Woman, don't try to trap me with a question like that, I know better...bitch.*
Now, lets take a step back and analyze this for a bit. She really was trying to get even more of a rise out of the situation, trying to add fuel to the fire by attempting to pose a bit of a "trick" question to me. What I mean by that is simply this: there is not a good answer to that question, considering it's a "yes" or "no" answer she is seeking.
If I answer "yes", it implies that I am admitting we are swamped, too busy for her and that she therefore is not a priority to me/us.
If I say "no" then it implies that there is no excuse for her not getting help, since we have all the fucking time in the world!
My answer?
"Well, yes Ma'am, we do seem to have a fair amount of business going on at the moment, but perhaps I can be of assistance. What can I do for you?"
*direct dodge*
"Well, (huff) I have been waiting and WAITING in the computer department for someone to help me! I've already called for help ONCE, and I'm NOT waiting much longer!"
Now, I can understand a bit. She asked for help and didn't get it (yet) so she's angry. However, we had alot of customers in the building and she isn't the only one which the earth revolves around, though she may think it. Our associates were genuinely doing all they could to get everyone some help, and I could clearly see that based on my security cameras. I get poised to speak on my walkie talkie that I have strapped to my hip, along with my ear piece attached, and I am about to ask for further assistance as she can CLEARLY see me doing....
"You guy's must not even want my money then!"
*woman, you've made your point, and you can clearly see I am trying to help you. Is taunting me and/or the store going to make more sales personnel magically *POOF* appear in front of you? No. You're acting childish and showing out because you're irritated. You look 40 and you're acting 4*
I was tempted to tell her, "No, we don't want your money actually, we've got plenty already. Have a nice day bitch."
She then proceeds to stop an employee purchasing a snack for him self at our registers (He was on his WELL EARNED lunch break for Christ's sake) before I can even ask for assistance to computers over my walkie talkie. Legally, he is not supposed to "help" her. Labor laws in Louisiana clearly state that he shouldn't assist her in any way while he is not getting paid for it. He could've told her to fuck off. But no...he begrudgingly helped her.
She proceeded to ask him questions, drug him back to the PC desktop displays and then left without purchasing anything.
*this woman complains like she really has some money to spend and as if we are doing her SUCH an injustice by denying her God given right to a computer, then leaves without buying shit*
Bitches....
*shakes head*
__________________________________________________________________________________
This was a bit of a strange thing for a customer to say to me, I thought.
A woman, her husband and some kids walk past my desk as they are exiting.
"Have a nice day"
"Hi Amanda!"
"...Hi!"
*I don't remember this woman, but ah, no biggie. Alot of customers remember me because I sold them something, but I often do not remember them. Just play it cool*
"So how are you liking it up here now? Is it better than the sales floor?"
(She is obviously referring to me changing positions from selling computers/cameras/etc to being asset protection at the front door)
"Oh it's a nice change of pace I guess. I enjoy it, yes"
"You know, you've got to come over and show me how to use my camera!"
* come again? Did she tell me I "Have got to come over"? To where? Her house? I don't even know this woman!*
I quickly thought of something because I didn't remember her, and she's saying I should come to her place and shit...
"Oh! Um...what kind of camera do you have once more? I'm sorry, I forgot!"
"It's the uuhhh...Nikon D60"
"Oh did you know you can go to Youtube and look up videos on it? Yeah ...."
I then proceed to change the subject toward how awesome Youtube has been in aiding me in my quest to learn Sony Vegas (software) functions.
"Oh thanks, I never thought of that!"
"Have a nice day!"
(weirdo...)
________________________________________________________________________________
Why, oh why God....
Why do these ghetto, hoodlum thug boys come in with sagging pants.
I can understand "baggy" pants a little. I myself enjoy baggy clothing, clothing that is loose fitting and not tight all over you. However, my clothing still fits me!
I wonder why women are - even for a millisecond - attracted to men who have their pants sagging. It's fucking... *eye twitch*... I hate the sight of it.
You fucking moron! Pull up your God damn pants.
The pants are by now around their knees almost, and their boxers are showing. They wear belts, not around their waist, but around their thighs.
The cuffs at the bottom of the pants are now pooled around the ankles, collecting in countless folds that look very similar to little accordions above their sneakers.
They look retarded.
It's a fad, I guess.
Am I the only person my age who feels like an old grandma by wanting to say, "Boy pull up your pants and get some clothes that fit you!" or "Take that hair pick out of your hair, what the hell is wrong with you?" or "No one wants to see your underwear you sloppy fucking pig."
Now, granted, I do not have the best attire in the world. I don't wear the best clothing available on the market, God knows. However, I wear clothing that FITS! That's the beautiful, brilliant and honest difference!
I am not making fun of something that are unable to help about themselves, as that would make me a total, utter and complete bitch.
No, I'm pointing out obviously retarded fashions that a person WILLINGLY takes part in! They WILLINGLY dress themselves up in this, and think it's cool.
I'd not date a person like that if they were the last person on earth.
____________________________________________________________________________________
A guy wanted help with a camcorder yesterday.
He asks a person on the sales floor for help, apparently wanting a certain audio/video cable with which to hook it to his television.
The associate excuses herself to go grab the cable for him.
Without waiting for the sales woman to come back to him, he leaves, saying his sales person "abandoned" him!
Bizarre, no?
He then proceeds to come up to the cashiers at the front of the store, near my desk. He leans over the counter and asks the cashier for help:
Signaling to the camcorder he has in his hand, he asks her, "Do you know anything about these?"
The cashier is...A CASHIER! She rings people up! She scans items, totals the transaction and takes their payment. She doesn't know about the electronics really, it's not her forte obviously. She answers him honestly, as she should:
"Well, no sir, not really..."
He gets angry with her, even though HE was the one who asked her the simple yes-or-no question!
"Well never mind! I wont waste my time telling you my story since you don't seem to care!"
....
This guy was just fucking nuts.
_________________________________________________________________________________
Oh! And Saturday I got cursed the fuck out by a customer! AWESOME!
I am required to log all TVs 32" and up, along with all computers which go out my door.
I record the model of the item, the date, transaction number and which register it was rung up on. It helps with many issues, too complicated to name all the reasons I do it. Let's just say it's needed information.
Two overly loud guys walk up to the register to my left, holding a 32" TV. They are joking amongst themselves, showing out. After the transaction, the cashier says to them, "Please let the lady at the door see your receipt as you walk out sir."
He turns to me and yells at me from 10 yards away or so, "Hey! You there! See my receipt!" as he obnoxiously waves it back and forth like a flag.
I smile.
*I want kick this guy in the groin*
The cashier gets his receipt back, and walks over to me, handing me the receipt for him.
I do my recording in my log book as he pick up his TV to carry it out.
"Have a nice day sir"
He now has the TV in his hands (but remember, it's only a 32 inch. It's not like he had 6 new born babies in his fucking arms! He can sit the TV down and take his receipt from me like a decent person. It's a feather weight TV ok!)
"Hey put that receipt in my pocket"
*wait, what?*
I laugh, thinking he's joking. I mean...what guy would request that a woman (a stranger no less) do something which involves such an invasion of privacy and personal space? Surely he's joking...
"No, seriously put the receipt in my pocket"
"Errr..no"
"PUT THE RECEIPT IN MY POCKET!"
My whole demeanor changes at this point.
My smile drops.
My face grows stern.
I look him straight in the face and I practically yell at him.
"I am NOT doing that!"
"Jesus fucking Christ, are you fucking kidding me?!!"
*yes sir, I am kidding you actually. I get that request all the time actually. Men regularly ask me to shove items in their pants, of course. You dumb ass*
I extend my arm forward even more, shoving the receipt in his face and AGAIN tell him to have a nice day.
He starts to rant and rave once more, putting his receipt away after he sets the TV down. He takes extra long so he can stand there beside me, talking shit as I am drowning him out.
*I want to slap him now as well*
I then interrupt and tell him, "Dude, I'm not touching you!"
"Well no one said you could have my receipt either!" he says as he now picks up his TV, and walks backward out my sliding glass doors, facing me so he can still talk shit to me.
I then smile and wave to him casually, as if shooing him out as he leaves
"Have a nice day PAL!"
The "pal" part is a little disrespectful for me to call him, yet not insulting enough for him to demand to speak with my manager.
What a dumb ass.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Ordinary Day
As I am now home from work, I am in the mood to simply write down all the little things that occurred throughout my day. My little Best Buy job is such a tiny one. I feel I am such a little contribution to the world's work force, one of the "little guys". And yet, as with all things, someone has to do it. And so my small pet peeves, observances and amusements from my place of employment are here to read, for whoever may stumble upon them.
A 10 hour day today. Originally planned for 9 hours, but as my post before this one indicated, our car installer kept me there late. I think it was actually more like 10.5 hours if I recall.
Upon arriving, I was greeted by my immediate supervisor Laura, and asked to pass out flyers at the door which read, "10% off all YELLOW TAGGED open box items" and I naturally told her I would (begrudgingly) obey her request.
hmmmmm...the internal struggle begins
See, I hate doing this for 2 reasons.
One is the fact that I consider the primary focus of my job to be the prevention of theft. I keep my eyes on the security cameras as much as I possibly can. I HATE it when people steal. I've caught most of my theft from simply scanning the store (My cameras are controlled by a joy stick type of panel with many buttons, it's fun!) randomly, whereupon I happened to pass over people stealing, or at least attempting to. However, if I am going to hand out flyers, I cannot keep watching the cameras, can I? Not unless I split myself into 2 people. My desk - or "stand" if you want to call it that - is located between our front doors. Exit on my left. Enter on my right. I have to take about 4 steps to the right to successfully put the flyer into the hands of the customer. Otherwise, if I stay stationary at my post, I must beckon the customer to come to me immediately upon their entrance through our sliding glass doors. This, through the unspoken understanding of social skills and body language, comes off as rude.
"Welcome to Best Buy Ma'am/Sir" *Shoves flyer at them from my hand expectantly looking at them to come to me, as I stay put to my spot, offering up an explaination of WHY they should come grab this paper from me*
This doesn't go over so well with people.
Do people like to be solicited to, immediately upon entering a store?
NO THEY DO NOT!
Do I enjoy being the one to do this to them?
I hate it more than the customers do, believe me. Few things in this world make me feel worse about myself then INCONVENIENCING OTHERS!
Thus enters my second reason as to why I hate this task when it is assigned to me: My hesitance towards approaching others when I feel it is unwanted.
"Well, isn't that natural?" one may ask.
Yes and no.
It is natural to not want to approach someone when you feel you are not wanted. I, however, share this feeling a bit more strongly than others (ah, see my blog on why I suck at management!)
I would rather punish myself with a thousand lashings than suffer the awkwardness I feel when I realize I have offended someone. It makes me fold like an aluminum can crushed underfoot.
I'm sorry I want to say to them as I am forced to pass them out to people who neither give a shit about whats written on it, nor do they care for the fact that I truly do not want to be there doing that to them.
So why analyze such a simple task? It's only handing out a flyer. Surely it isn't healthy to analyze such trivial things so intensely, is it?
Maybe it isn't healthy, but I analyze EVERYTHING and so I can't help it. That's how I am I guess.
After handing out a few, I attempted to make it look like I was at least making an effort to hand them out whenever I would see that a manager was watching me. It's amazing just how many people of the general public enter into store with their cell phones plastered to their ears. Not one customer in that building goes in or out without me seeing them, as I am situated between the ONLY enter and exit doors. I get to observe people as if they were ants in an ant farm, due to my aerial view from my security cameras. They are fully exposed to me. Through this, I am aware of how people also act when they think no one is watching.
Oh, but someone is. *evil laugh* I see them argue with their spouse, pick their nose, scratch their ass, spank their kid, dance in the isle to music and grope their lover. We do these things when we think no one is watching I suppose. Yes, I shall be brutally honest. Everyone has at some in their life point picked their damn nose. Don't tell me you haven't! Bullshit.
I do not pass them to those with cell phones stuck to their ears. I do not pass them to people who have merchandise in their hands for returns, as I can see they are clearly busy or have their hands full. I do not pass them to the customers who are juggling kids, telling them to stop running in the store. I do not pass them to those who approach my desk immediately upon entering, because they are readying themselves to ask me a question. I do not pass them to those who are clearly engaged in conversations with other people upon entering. I do not pass them to people who are walking quickly, looking as if they are in a hurry. I even go so far as to not pass them to those who are entering, looking to their right, intently focusing on the direction OPPOSITE of me.
Through all this, I find an excuse in my mind not to trouble the person entering the door. I can't bring myself to do that. I begin to lift the paper in my hands, look at them and flip through my rolodex of excuses in my mind to not hand it to them, quickly settling on the first excuse I find.
I stop handing them out.
I don't want to be rude.
I listened for the sound of keys jingling, dangling from the waist's belt loop just as all the managers seem to have hanging from them. It's my warning that a manager is near or approaching. As I heard the keys, I would make sure I had a flyer in hand to at least appear I was handing out the damn things. I was uncomfortable for a few hours.
Laura left after a while though, and so I was left with just Joel and Paul running the store. Joel asks me to hand out flyers sometimes, but doesn't bitch at me for not being successful at it, which I am grateful for. I think he understands my shyness. Paul couldn't care less about the flyers, I can tell. He doesn't give a shit about them. After Joel left, I was free to throw them away.
_____________________________________________________________________________
I flip through songs in my head throughout my days at work. I settled on one that made me giggle, remember a recent Youtube video that featured it.
Electric Six
Gay Bar
You!
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar.
....
And so on and so forth. Very amusing song, so bouncy and never fails to make me smile.
Ah, now what a dangerous song to sing to myself in my head! I might find it amusing, but I do have a hard time separating my intense thoughts from reality.
"Welcome to Best Buy" I greet the customers.
Sort of a programmed response, you know? I hear the door slide open, and the words are upon my lips immediately as I lift my head from my monitor while meeting the eyes of the customer.
With me, there is a problem with such "autopilot" responses.
They frequently mix with my internal thoughts that I never intended to spill forth!
"Welcome to gay....uuh....Best Buy!"
Thankfully, the "gay" bit was lowered to a barely audible whisper as an alarm went off in my head as to what I was saying, but my body wasn't responding fast enough to actually STOP the word from being forced out.
Instead, it ended up being a "gay" whisper.
Horrified at what I did, I told the nearest cashier what I'd done, thinking she would find it funny and offer some sympathy for my stupidity, but I think she thought I was joking.
__________________________________________________________________________
As I have said before, we as humans are growing more and more stupid. Most of us are taught the ABC's from a very, very young age. Maybe 3. Sometimes earlier. Whatever.
Anyhow, the point is, 99% of people should know their ABC's!!! I understand if you are from a country that does not incorporate this structure of alphabet into your language. Americans who speak English, however, should know the alphabet. That's a given fact. I'm sure I could ask any customer to recite them, and they could no doubt.
With that being said, people should be able to locate something that is alphabetical order, right? It DOES correspond with the very same structure of letters that I just mentioned, after all.
No.
They won't do it.
They either won't do it, or can't do it. Looking something up alphabetically has proven too much for the people in my region. It's fucking amazing and sad at the same time.
We are a large store, a little over 40,000 square feet. In our store, we feature electronics, movies, games, cds, appliances, computers, mp3 players, cameras, camcorders, wireless phones, car audio, home theater systems, TVs and many many other little items. Quite a few things! In the center of this store are the movies and music sections, very conspicuously labeled by gigantic signs, hung from the ceiling and looming over each department.
I watch customers walk all over the store sometimes, looking for an item, while ignoring the signs that are clearly posted above each department. I could understand if the signs were little, but no, they are HUGE. Each weighs around 100 pounds! They are practically billboards! They do not read them however, out of....laziness? Stupidity? Who knows why they do not read them, the point is, they don't. I watch them hopelessly search and search. Remember, I can see them with my cameras ;) I'm always watching.
Now this, in itself is sheer stupidity! They walk all over the store, ignoring the signs which point out where the items are.
Given this fact....given this observation...now wrap your head around this:
They will walk all over the store for something, with seemingly no direction or hint of where they are going and yet.... YET!.... when it comes to looking something up in alphabetical order - a STRUCTURED ORDER set in stone! - they look to me hopelessly and pitifully pleading for "help" finding it!
WHAT
THE
FUCK
A 10 hour day today. Originally planned for 9 hours, but as my post before this one indicated, our car installer kept me there late. I think it was actually more like 10.5 hours if I recall.
Upon arriving, I was greeted by my immediate supervisor Laura, and asked to pass out flyers at the door which read, "10% off all YELLOW TAGGED open box items" and I naturally told her I would (begrudgingly) obey her request.
hmmmmm...the internal struggle begins
See, I hate doing this for 2 reasons.
One is the fact that I consider the primary focus of my job to be the prevention of theft. I keep my eyes on the security cameras as much as I possibly can. I HATE it when people steal. I've caught most of my theft from simply scanning the store (My cameras are controlled by a joy stick type of panel with many buttons, it's fun!) randomly, whereupon I happened to pass over people stealing, or at least attempting to. However, if I am going to hand out flyers, I cannot keep watching the cameras, can I? Not unless I split myself into 2 people. My desk - or "stand" if you want to call it that - is located between our front doors. Exit on my left. Enter on my right. I have to take about 4 steps to the right to successfully put the flyer into the hands of the customer. Otherwise, if I stay stationary at my post, I must beckon the customer to come to me immediately upon their entrance through our sliding glass doors. This, through the unspoken understanding of social skills and body language, comes off as rude.
"Welcome to Best Buy Ma'am/Sir" *Shoves flyer at them from my hand expectantly looking at them to come to me, as I stay put to my spot, offering up an explaination of WHY they should come grab this paper from me*
This doesn't go over so well with people.
Do people like to be solicited to, immediately upon entering a store?
NO THEY DO NOT!
Do I enjoy being the one to do this to them?
I hate it more than the customers do, believe me. Few things in this world make me feel worse about myself then INCONVENIENCING OTHERS!
Thus enters my second reason as to why I hate this task when it is assigned to me: My hesitance towards approaching others when I feel it is unwanted.
"Well, isn't that natural?" one may ask.
Yes and no.
It is natural to not want to approach someone when you feel you are not wanted. I, however, share this feeling a bit more strongly than others (ah, see my blog on why I suck at management!)
I would rather punish myself with a thousand lashings than suffer the awkwardness I feel when I realize I have offended someone. It makes me fold like an aluminum can crushed underfoot.
I'm sorry I want to say to them as I am forced to pass them out to people who neither give a shit about whats written on it, nor do they care for the fact that I truly do not want to be there doing that to them.
So why analyze such a simple task? It's only handing out a flyer. Surely it isn't healthy to analyze such trivial things so intensely, is it?
Maybe it isn't healthy, but I analyze EVERYTHING and so I can't help it. That's how I am I guess.
After handing out a few, I attempted to make it look like I was at least making an effort to hand them out whenever I would see that a manager was watching me. It's amazing just how many people of the general public enter into store with their cell phones plastered to their ears. Not one customer in that building goes in or out without me seeing them, as I am situated between the ONLY enter and exit doors. I get to observe people as if they were ants in an ant farm, due to my aerial view from my security cameras. They are fully exposed to me. Through this, I am aware of how people also act when they think no one is watching.
Oh, but someone is. *evil laugh* I see them argue with their spouse, pick their nose, scratch their ass, spank their kid, dance in the isle to music and grope their lover. We do these things when we think no one is watching I suppose. Yes, I shall be brutally honest. Everyone has at some in their life point picked their damn nose. Don't tell me you haven't! Bullshit.
I do not pass them to those with cell phones stuck to their ears. I do not pass them to people who have merchandise in their hands for returns, as I can see they are clearly busy or have their hands full. I do not pass them to the customers who are juggling kids, telling them to stop running in the store. I do not pass them to those who approach my desk immediately upon entering, because they are readying themselves to ask me a question. I do not pass them to those who are clearly engaged in conversations with other people upon entering. I do not pass them to people who are walking quickly, looking as if they are in a hurry. I even go so far as to not pass them to those who are entering, looking to their right, intently focusing on the direction OPPOSITE of me.
Through all this, I find an excuse in my mind not to trouble the person entering the door. I can't bring myself to do that. I begin to lift the paper in my hands, look at them and flip through my rolodex of excuses in my mind to not hand it to them, quickly settling on the first excuse I find.
I stop handing them out.
I don't want to be rude.
I listened for the sound of keys jingling, dangling from the waist's belt loop just as all the managers seem to have hanging from them. It's my warning that a manager is near or approaching. As I heard the keys, I would make sure I had a flyer in hand to at least appear I was handing out the damn things. I was uncomfortable for a few hours.
Laura left after a while though, and so I was left with just Joel and Paul running the store. Joel asks me to hand out flyers sometimes, but doesn't bitch at me for not being successful at it, which I am grateful for. I think he understands my shyness. Paul couldn't care less about the flyers, I can tell. He doesn't give a shit about them. After Joel left, I was free to throw them away.
_____________________________________________________________________________
I flip through songs in my head throughout my days at work. I settled on one that made me giggle, remember a recent Youtube video that featured it.
Electric Six
Gay Bar
You!
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar,
I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar.
....
And so on and so forth. Very amusing song, so bouncy and never fails to make me smile.
Ah, now what a dangerous song to sing to myself in my head! I might find it amusing, but I do have a hard time separating my intense thoughts from reality.
"Welcome to Best Buy" I greet the customers.
Sort of a programmed response, you know? I hear the door slide open, and the words are upon my lips immediately as I lift my head from my monitor while meeting the eyes of the customer.
With me, there is a problem with such "autopilot" responses.
They frequently mix with my internal thoughts that I never intended to spill forth!
"Welcome to gay....uuh....Best Buy!"
Thankfully, the "gay" bit was lowered to a barely audible whisper as an alarm went off in my head as to what I was saying, but my body wasn't responding fast enough to actually STOP the word from being forced out.
Instead, it ended up being a "gay" whisper.
Horrified at what I did, I told the nearest cashier what I'd done, thinking she would find it funny and offer some sympathy for my stupidity, but I think she thought I was joking.
__________________________________________________________________________
As I have said before, we as humans are growing more and more stupid. Most of us are taught the ABC's from a very, very young age. Maybe 3. Sometimes earlier. Whatever.
Anyhow, the point is, 99% of people should know their ABC's!!! I understand if you are from a country that does not incorporate this structure of alphabet into your language. Americans who speak English, however, should know the alphabet. That's a given fact. I'm sure I could ask any customer to recite them, and they could no doubt.
With that being said, people should be able to locate something that is alphabetical order, right? It DOES correspond with the very same structure of letters that I just mentioned, after all.
No.
They won't do it.
They either won't do it, or can't do it. Looking something up alphabetically has proven too much for the people in my region. It's fucking amazing and sad at the same time.
We are a large store, a little over 40,000 square feet. In our store, we feature electronics, movies, games, cds, appliances, computers, mp3 players, cameras, camcorders, wireless phones, car audio, home theater systems, TVs and many many other little items. Quite a few things! In the center of this store are the movies and music sections, very conspicuously labeled by gigantic signs, hung from the ceiling and looming over each department.
I watch customers walk all over the store sometimes, looking for an item, while ignoring the signs that are clearly posted above each department. I could understand if the signs were little, but no, they are HUGE. Each weighs around 100 pounds! They are practically billboards! They do not read them however, out of....laziness? Stupidity? Who knows why they do not read them, the point is, they don't. I watch them hopelessly search and search. Remember, I can see them with my cameras ;) I'm always watching.
Now this, in itself is sheer stupidity! They walk all over the store, ignoring the signs which point out where the items are.
Given this fact....given this observation...now wrap your head around this:
They will walk all over the store for something, with seemingly no direction or hint of where they are going and yet.... YET!.... when it comes to looking something up in alphabetical order - a STRUCTURED ORDER set in stone! - they look to me hopelessly and pitifully pleading for "help" finding it!
WHAT
THE
FUCK
Ha!
I actually was able to post a picture of me, taken with one of our store's many display computers which feature built in web cams. I am wasting time at work! This is AWESOME! I *never* get to do this! As it turns out, tonight I am waiting for our car installer to finish up his last car audio installation. Of course, since I am a part of the store's "security", I am the last person to leave the building, along with a manager. So here I wait... with nothing to do. This is pretty freaking sweet. I can't believe I am getting away with this. A part of me feels like I am doing something a little taboo... oooooh I am such a rebel!
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